DIY - Fidget Spinners

So like almost every child in America, my kids have been asking for a fidget spinner. I've seen some in stores and online, but being me I thought it would be more fun to make one ourselves. To my surprise, it's extremely easy to make one and super cheap (less than $2 a piece). Plus, the kids got to pick out their own designs and colors. I wanted to share how we did it and the end product with everyone in case anyone wants to try it :)

1) Fidget spinners are basically just skateboard wheel bearings with some added weight to give it a longer spin. So I found some online. It was a pack of 8 bearings for about $6. I also got free shipping!

2) Next, I took the kids to the hardware store to buy some nuts and bolts. They were about 8 cents a piece, so I probably spent $1.50.

3) Then I let them design their spinners however they wanted and took some pictures on my phone.

Stevie designed the Triforce from Zelda

Neela designed a star

4) Next, I super glued the pieces together (but NOT to the bearing yet)

 5) Once I had the pieces glued together, I found some spray paint and let the kids pick colors.

6) After the glue and paint dried, I just super glued them to the bearing. And that's it. Seriously! Once the glue is set, they are ready to spin :)

Stevie's Triforce

Titus's American Flag Snowflake

Have fun spinning!!

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth

What advice would I give younger me?

For some reason, the idea of "If you could go back in time, what advice would you give yourself?" keeps popping up in my head. Lately, I've been hearing it in conversations (in person and on the radio), in songs, books, and on tv shows. So that's really made me stop and think of what I would tell myself if I could go back?

At first, I thought about going back to my high school years when I was just a big band geek with polyester shirts and a big ole' afro. Hahahaha. I had absolutely no self confidence, but also thought I was always right about everything. If a topic came up in conversation, people needed to hear what I had to say because it was clearly the right answer. ;) I could tell myself to just be confident in who I am. It's ok to be weird and not to try so hard to stand out of the crowd. Maybe that if I would just talk to new people, I wouldn't have to be so shy around strangers. People might actually enjoy being around me.

Then I moved onto thinking about when Crissy and I were first married. I could go back and tell myself to quit worrying so much about the future and to enjoy the moment. I was constantly working for our "next step in life". We needed to both graduate college, get good jobs, buy a house, and have kids. Everyday seemed to be just another notch on the belt of setting up our dream lives. I thought about telling 20 year old Seth that he needs to maybe enjoy the season of life he is in. That he's going to miss being broke, living in an apartment with six foot ceilings (I'm 6'2), and just living on love with his best friend. I could tell him to savor those moments.

Next, I moved onto when Crissy and I first started having kids. We had both graduated with our Masters and had three little ones. Our little family were renting a small little house near the college. I was so set on finding a career that made good money so I would be able to provide. Crissy had an excellent job with a lot of money; however, I didn't have the same outcome with my job search. I worked random jobs while I was constantly searching for "the job". I became so depressed when I was unable to find it. Crissy would constantly tell me to just enjoy the free time together that we were given in this season of our lives. Her job was very flexible and she made good money. So we made enough to get by and more importantly had so much time together, but I just couldn't accept the fact that I wasn't making enough for her to stay home full time with the kids. If I went back, I could tell myself to listen and enjoy these moments of being together as a family. Not to just constantly be a grump about not having this amazing job I always dreamt of having.

Finally, I thought on what I would say to myself about 5 years ago. This was probably the longest point of time I sit and wondered about. Having your best friend, wife, and mom of your kids walk out was the lowest point in my life. At first, I was constantly trying to fix everything. Monitoring bank statements, searching the house for clues to her newfound mystery life away from home, asking specific questions and demanding answers. I just couldn't believe it. I was heartbroken. Not only did she pretty much evaporate from my life, but there were these four little faces just staring up at me just as heartbroken and needing love. I could tell myself to lighten up. You can't change other people. That's up to God. However, you are in control of how you react to situations. I could say to myself that in the end, you'll be happier than you ever were before. And yes, you will get a divorce. And no, you won't have to keep fighting to have her back or even want to get back together. I could say not to worry so much about all of the custody stuff and financial strain that addiction causes you. In the end, it will all work out.

So, those were the thoughts that I kept juggling around in my head each time this question came up. Then, I remembered something my dad said a long time ago when someone asked him this question. It was a Father's Day church service and the pastor called up a few fathers to the stage. He asked them the question of "If you could go back and change one thing, what would it be?" He was hoping hearing older men talk about things they wished they did different would impact the younger men listening. I believe there was about 5 men called up. My dad was last in line. Each man before him gave these amazing insights on how they could fix mistakes they've made by doing "xyz". When it got to my dad, he talked a little while about various mistakes and things he'd wished he had done differently. But he ended by saying, even after all of that, I wouldn't change a thing. Because all of that made me who I am today. (My dad is so wise.)

After I started thinking about that, I realized that I really would hate the idea of giving my past self advice. Sure, there was so much room for improvement. But that's just the beauty of our journey isn't it?

-Being a nerdy kid who insisted on being ultra different, but all of that helped me find out who I was.

-Thinking back on how I rushed through sweet moments in the past has helped me realize to embrace each day as it comes. I don't want to look forward to tomorrow anymore. I want to enjoy right now.

-Going through a divorce and completely readjusting my entire life to be a single dad of four kids was hell on earth. But geez, the person that God has molded me into is someone I had always wanted to be when I was younger. Someone who is just full of joy.

So yeah. I would never want to change a thing about my past. Sure there are memories and things I still regret, but without them I wouldn't be where I am today. (laying on a bed covered in Chex Mix crumbs typing this blog post on a laptop with kool-aid finger prints on the screen) :D

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,
Seth

Megow Kids Q&A - Pet Peeves

What do think the term "pet peeve" means?

Stevie: "Things you don't like, but they always happen."

Neela: "That's when you have a pet and it pees a lot."

Titus: "Dad. I'm not dumb. That's a made up word."

Olive: *lays head on table* "42"

(Dad explains what it means)

What is your biggest pet peeve?

Stevie: "Buying and picking out clothes. I hate clothes. I wish we were like animals and had fur. That way I wouldn't have to wear clothes. Plus, I would always be warm and cozy."

Neela: "Not having a dog. I need a dog dad."

Titus: "When people litter."

Olive: "These questions."

What is something that dad says that gets on your nerves?

Stevie: "Clean your room."

Neela: "When you tell me that I can't lick your hair like a cat."

Titus: "No more screen time or my brain will rot."

Olive: "No."

What is something that dad does that gets on your nerves?

Stevie: "When you fart. It's so bad."

Neela: "You don't let me watch scary movies."

Titus: "When you sing the Rudolph song to make us not fight."

Olive: "When you make me be in nature. I like inside and snacks, not hiking and bugs."

What is the worst part about going to school?

Stevie: "Not seeing dad."

Neela: "Not learning about more animals. Math is dumb. I wish I could go to an outside nature school."

Titus: "I like all the parts of school and I love my teacher."

Olive: "Waking up."

What is your least favorite part of the day?

Stevie: "I don't have a least favorite part."

Neela: "The part about when I remember I don't have a dog."

Titus: "Doing homework."

Olive: "Right now."

Worst movie ever?

Stevie: "Nightmare before Christmas. I saw a part of it one time. I hated it."

Neela: "Mickey Mouse."

Titus: "Pokemon. It's so annoying."

Olive: "Grown up shows."

Grossest food ever?

Stevie: "Popcorn"

Neela: "Black Eyed Peas."

Titus: "I like everything."

Olive: "Olives"

When you grow up, what is the one job you would never want to do?

Stevie: "Surgery"

Neela: "A butt doctor"
Titus: "Nurse"

Olive: "A grown up"

What is the hardest part about being a kid?

Stevie: "That I won't be a kid forever."

Neela: "That I don't have a phone so I can't order pizza."

Titus: "Not being able to see aquariums whenever I want."

Olive: "You can't drive to Dairy Queen when you are a kid."

What is the hardest part about being the oldest? Or what do you think it would be if you were?

Stevie: "Taking care of everything"

Neela: "I wouldn't be able to sleep outside."

Titus: "Going to longer schools and waiting."

Olive: "Stevie."

What is the hardest part about being the middle child? Or what do you think it would be if you were?

Stevie: "Never being able to do anything fun."

Neela: "I can't open doors. I just follow people and run in the door behind them."

Titus: "I can't bring electronic things with me to town."

Olive: "This is ridiculous."

What is the hardest part about being the only boy? Or what do you think it would be if you were the only girl?

Stevie: "No girls could spend the night."

Neela: "Too hard to poop rainbows. Only girl power makes you poop rainbows."

Titus: "It makes me miss mommy so much."

Olive: *walks away*

What is the hardest part about being the youngest? Or what do you think it would be if you were?

Stevie: "I would have a big belly because everyone would give me all of their snacks."

Neela: "I want to be the youngest wolf in a wolf pack."

Titus: "Being called a baby."

Olive: *from across the room* "I'm not coming back over there."

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth 

Raising Four Kids Alone

I’ve gotten to know quite a few people since I’ve become a single parent, also I believe quite a few people have gotten to know me via the internet. It’s fun talking into friends in the grocery store, at the park, at church, or even over texts/facebook messages. Whenever I am talking to people I don’t normally communicate with on a regular basis, normally the first thing they say is “I don’t know how you do raise four kids by yourself.” Hahahaha. Honestly, so so many people have life way harder than me. I think my life is a cake walk compared to a single mom. But, since I get asked so much I’d like to expand on that question during this post.

Most of the time when I get asked that question, I just smile and tell the truth. “My kids are just so great. They make it enjoyable.” That’s really the truth. I am just fully in love with my kids. They are my best friends. We are the type of family that does life together. Of course I try to encourage their own individual interests and set aside special time to devote solely to each of them, but most of our time is spent as a group. It’s just how we make it work. I think that’s one of the reasons I always give credit to my kids. Of course they argue and fight. Each of us has our own issues, but that’s the beauty of it. We work through it all together. In our house, no one will ever have to go alone. I just love the idea of that. No matter what happens in my life or how horrible of a day I might be having, I have four little people who believe in me and actively show me love.

However, it wasn’t always second nature to me. To be honest, at first the realization that this was “real life” for me was beyond intimidating. Waking up early to get four kids ready for school as well as getting myself ready for work, juggling all of the home and my career responsibilities, taking on the full financial load of a family of five with no extra income besides what I bring to the table, picking up and dropping off for every event, school day, doctor’s appointment, parent/teach conference, etc. and finally acting as dad & mom in my house just seemed too much. Finally after months of trial and error and praying/thinking about what my little crew REALLY needed, I realized that my kids just needed me to be there. They can do without fancy clothes, extravagant vacations, and the nicest toys. Each of them simply want dad to be fully committed to their lives.

Besides the fact that my kids are my favorite people in the world, there are a few other tricks that I utilize to keep my sanity:

1) Don’t sweat the small stuff.

2) My definition of “the small stuff” was dramatically changed over the past few years. Hahaha. Now it’s more like “the medium stuff”. Basically, I just added a few things to the list for me not to worry about (random piles of junk laying around my house, matching socks, separating whites from colors in the laundry, making it to every event we are invited to, etc) I just do what I can do. Besides that, I honestly try to just not worry about it.

3) Figure out exactly how each of my kids show/receive love and laser beam focus on that junk. I don’t have time or resources to do everything I would want as a parent, so I need to make sure I’m ultra-intentional on how I do spend those things.

4) Find the joy in every situation. There will always be something sad/frustrating/annoying in every single aspect of life. It’s not that you shouldn’t acknowledge those things, but I like to make it a point to highlight to myself and my kids something positive in everything we do.

5) Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks. Haters gonna hate. So I just do me. I mean I’m a single adult male who drives a mini-van. Hahaha. I couldn’t care less about that people think of me cruising up in my 2008 Dodge Grand Caravan.

6) Embrace practicality. When I learned to cut out the fluff and frou-frou, things got way easier for me. My dream Christmas present? Pay my monthly water bill :) hahaha.


All of this being said, I do rent a permanent seat on the struggle bus. Do I think of myself as a perfect parent? HAHAHAHA!! No. Heck no. No times infinity. Geez, I probably screw up more than most everyone reading this. There’s only so many times a human can slip in spilled chocolate milk before they kinda lose it ;) If you’ve been around me in person, I’m sure you seen me lose my cool with my kiddos before. When they act out, and I don’t always respond in the best manner. I over react quite a bit and don’t always dive into each situation as I should. There’s normally always someone whining, crying, mad or upset. Bottom line, they are kids. Also, they are kids who’ve went through emotional trauma. They are bound to act out because their little, sweet brains don’t know how to deal with some of these crazy, hard emotional situations that surface from time to time. Seriously though, every parent in the world is flawed. We just do what we can and try our 103% best.

Now, another question… Do I think of myself as an awesome parent? ---- YES!!! Is it because of anything I say or do? Nope. Honestly, it’s just because I’m there. Being there makes anyone an awesome parent. It’s not some special secret formula. Whether you spend thousands of dollars taking your kid to Disney world or just sit and color imaginary animals with them, to me it’s all the same. Just devoting time to them makes you their hero.

Tonight, I was putting away dishes and Titus walked up to me & asked if we could lay together on the couch. So we did. After a few minutes of us just talking and watching a movie together, he makes a really serious face, looks at me and says “Daddy. Would you ever leave us?” I smiled and said, “Of course not buddy. You are stuck with me.” His face stayed serious while he said, “No. I’m serious. What if we don’t clean up the house good enough or I do something bad? Would you ever leave us then?” I paused for a moment and looked at him & said “Buddy. I'm never, ever going to leave you. I promise.” He just smiled and wrapped himself up in my arms on the couch. Really that’s what it all boils down to. Regardless of what happens, I’m there. That’s how I parent four kids solo. Screw ups and all, I’m still just there, and they are there for me.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth

How Kids are Similar to Dogs

Easily distracted.

Can sleep anywhere...

but prefer sleeping in your bed...

and love to be the first thing you see when you wake up.

Love to pee anywhere and everywhere.

Dog or little boy... we'll never know. ;)

Not huge fans of the term "Personal Space".

Both love to get dirty...

luckily, they have a shared love for bath time.

Both enjoy dog biscuits.

Enjoy walks...until they decide the walk is over.

Follow you to the toilet.

Finally, unsupervised time is not recommended with either.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth

The Megows: A-Z

A - Awesomest Kids on the Planet

It's no secret that I think my kids are legit the coolest humans on the planet, but I wanted to talk about this more in depth. It's hard to put into words how awesome they are because sometimes they literally leave me speechless. hahahaha. For example, tonight after dinner I walked into the kitchen to find Titus and Olive sitting on the floor, randomly wearing swimsuits and googles, and both chugging ice water out of sand bucket pails. Meanwhile, Neela was laying on the couch with her bearded dragon on her chest watching How to Train Your Dragon because "she needs to learn more about her own kind". Finally, Stevie was sitting in her room drawing little pictures to give our friends at school and singing "Strawberry Fields Forever" quietly to herself.

They are just all so unique and full of life. I love how they randomly pair up sometimes and at other instances, they sit by themselves to dive into something that interests them. They are the most kind, helpful, hilarious, cheerful, and loving humans that I have ever met. I freaking love those four little people :)

B - Birthdays

With four kids, there's always a birthday around the corner. And that's pretty ok with me. We love us some birthdays. From the planning to the actual event, there's just so much to enjoy. I love putting in time to make them feel special. As my kids get older, they are all chipping it in help with each others' parties as well. It melts my heart to see them get genuinely excited about making their siblings feel special. It's hard to do big things for just one kid with the way our family is setup, but birthdays are the perfect opportunity for that. I've written some posts about all of our past birthday parties. You can read about them here! 

C - Cats

 

Because... Duh. Cats

D -Dirty kids

I love when my kids come in muddy and their clothes are just so filthy from exploring, playing, and experimenting. This is a good thing since they seem to stay coated in an exoskeleton of dirt.

E - Excitable

Seth: "Hey guys. Do you want me to hook up the sprinkler and fill up th..."
Kids *before I can finish*: "AAAAHHHH  YYEESSS!!" (as they sprint to the backyard stripping off their clothes)

F - Frog Hunts

Maybe we've just got frog huntin' on our brains because the season to catch our favorite amphibians is approaching fast. If you visit our house on a steaming hot South GA summer night, there's a high likely hood that you'll catch us in the ditch.

"Prepping for a hunt"

"One of our frogs.

Dont worry we catch and release :) "

G - Good Lookin'

Not trying to brag but Geez Louise do I have some good looking youngins.

H - How did you make someone smile today?

This one might be my favorite. For a few years now, we go around the dinner table and we each have to say "How did you make someone smile today?" It's just one of those little things I love about my family so much.


I - It's gonna be a great day

Our family song. I made it up one morning a few years ago. It's now just become a normal part of our mornings :)

J - Jokes

All of us love to tell a good joke. Olive will tell you an endless amount of nonsense Knock Knock Joke, while Stevie might go with her staple "Why can't you get Elsa a balloon?" - "Because she will let it go." :D I prefer to embrace my role as a father by annoying everyone around me with classic dad jokes.

K - Kids

I love kids. They are so much cooler than adults. We have sleepovers and friends over quite frequently. In my opinion, once you are quadruple outnumbered, who's even counting anymore :)

L - Lunch trays

School lunch trays are served about every night at dinner. It helps me remember to fill each slot with healthy foods. Plus, aren't they just so fun! :D

M - Mr Rogers

Duh. M would be Mr. Rogers. If you follow my instagram or facebook, I'm constantly sharing Mr. Rogers quotes. He's my personal hero. I simply loved his view on life. I've even wrote a post specifically about why I love him so much.

N - Nature

Yay for outside, bugs, hiking, rainstorms, camping, critters, mud, climbing trees, exploring, flowers, clouds, and adventures!!

O - Odor

I'm not gonna lie. My kids can do activities and have fun that produce smells that are undescribable. Just imagine "little kid after playing outside for a few hours" mixed with farts and hummus breathe. I love these kids, but wow. Two words: Bath Time ;)

P - Parks

My crew are park connoisseurs. We know about every park within 20 miles. I mean why wouldn't we? It's free fun, and I hate the idea of getting into a rut of activities... For instance going to the same park over and over and over and doing the same things time and time again. I like that my kids love to switch it up. However, they each have their own favorites.

Q - Quiet Time

Wait... What's quiet time?

R - Rambunctious

This Megow characteristic is why I never get the "Quiet Time" previously mentioned... :)

Hahaha. Side note: My kids love Frozen Yogurt.

S - Single parenting

Yup. Just me and my kiddos. They are why I smile. They are my drive to succeed. They are the reason I'm happy to lose sleep. They are the joy in my heart.

T - Talented

Whether it's art, magic tricks, talking to "aminals", or fashion. Each of them shines in their own special talents.

My gorgeous little artist lost in thought...  

U - Untidy

Megows are a naturally untidy people. My office desk is a wreck and our house is usually not much better. HOWEVER!! Me and the kids have been trying ultra hard lately to turn this around!! I must say I'm pretty proud of the progress we have made. :)

The Patented Megow Mopping Method

V - VSU 

My job... Valdosta State University. My co-workers have pretty much adopted my kids as part of our team up there. I can't say it enough how grateful I am for my job, bosses, and co-workers.

My kids are PROFESSIONALS at sitting quietly and ultra well behaved at college events :)

W - Waffles

Because Waffles is the most important word to start with "w"

X - X marks the spot

Treasure Hunts! Scavenger Hunts! Clue Hunts! Challenge Hunts! My kids love looking for treasure, and I love to plan them out! :)

Y - Yes!!

I hear it all the time. "People need to learn to say No". While that can be good advice, I try to instill the desire to say "Yes!". When people are in need, just help! If you have a neat idea on how to bless someone, just do it! We stay pretty busy, but I pray that when my kids get older they will always remember their childhood was spent serving others.

Z - Zelda 

Each of my kids have special time with dad at various nights of the week. We call this alone time. It's so hard to get these one on one moments. The kids and I thoroughly enjoy it. And it all started with Stevie's love of Zelda. We started carving out time for us to sit alone and play her favorite game of all time. Zelda. I love how those few minutes playing that game (I don't really play video games btw) turned into such a rich tradition for our family.

My princess Zelda :)

Well that's the Megows A-Z. Hope you enjoyed and have a great day!

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth 

Top Ten List: Why Megows Love Spring

10) I can skip the bathtub and start just throwing soap on the kids in the kiddie pool. This year, I'm going try mixing in some No Tears Shampoo/Body Wash in some water balloons and just setting a big bucket in the backyard. I'm gonna call them "clean bombs".

9) Spring means time for me to bust out my cut-offs. Also, it's a terrifying reminder of my growing gut. So that's some motivation to lay off the root beer floats and pork rinds.

Sorry ladies. Say goodbye to this dad bod this spring ;)

Support Groups are available if needed.

8) I'm no longer the scourge of the neighborhood since I finally remove the Christmas decorations off my porch. 

7) It's the perfect time to go digging 'round for some bugs and critters :)

"I found a millipede. I'm going to name his Charles."

6) Tax return season. I have four kids. You do the math. #whowantstogoforicecream #noshameinmygame

5) There's no need for flashlights at night since my skin still has it's neon white glow from winter.

"Howdy."

4) Spring means wildflowers. My kids are always picking people wildflowers, and truthfully it's one of my favorite things in the world. 

Cute, squishy, tiny Baby Olive enjoying God's creation

3) Aprils Fool's Day!! Forget Christmas or New Year's. Megows get straight up crunk on A.F.D. Just FYI, no one is safe... ;)

2) Spring Break. Not for fancy vacations or spring cleaning. Mostly, I'm just ultra excited that I don't have to get four kids up, fed, dressed, and ready for school for an entire week. That also means I don't have to worry about tardies for five sweet, perfect days.

1) Finally, it's still cool enough in the evenings to light up our firepit (And speaking of tardies, this is the perfect way to dispose of the school's notifications letters about my kids excessive number of tardies which consequently start arriving around this time of year)

"Burn baby burn... Tardy Inferno"

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth

Keepin' it Weird

 “Look how weird I drew this dragon. Will you hang it up?” – Stevie

“I like being called weird.” – Neela

“This food tastes weird. That means I like it.” – Titus

“Daddy, you got a weird neck. I love to squish it. It's my favorite.” – Olive

Being weird gets a bad rap in our society. While I don’t view it as derogatory for people to try to be normal, I just think everyone has some stuff about them that’s 100% unique. It’s so sad when people choose not to embrace it. In the Megow house, being “weird” is viewed as something we each strive to achieve. Not to just be weird for weird’s sake, but for each of us to be 100% ourselves. As a parent and a former “weird kid”, it’s so interesting seeing and nurturing my kids’ own individualism. Mostly, I just want to foster a safe place in our home for my kids to be completely themselves. I think one of my main goals is to really, highlight and compliment little things that are uniquely them.

I’m a big believer in the concept of nature vs nuture. Some skills and attributes can be learned or taught; however others are just kinda engrained in our DNA. I like to think every family tree has their own special mini superpower. Whether it is athleticism, organizational skills, musical talent, charm, drive for success, or any multitude of various intelligences, I believe everyone is born with something that just runs in their gene pool. The other day I randomly realized what the Megow family engrained mini superpower was. We are almost all impervious to peer pressure. I’m dead serious. Megows just kind of do whatever the heck they want and really don’t pay much mind to fitting any sort of social mold. If you know my family, I believe you will immediately recognize this. My parents are completely themselves.  As I lovingly explained earlier, they are pretty weird. Tom and Denise just do their own things. My dad wore wooden clog shoes as a nurse anesthetist in the hospital for decades without really caring whatever anyone would think. Just because he liked them. Then transitioned careers to start a local food bank. That career move was a significant decrease in pay. I’m sure he could have measured his career by his peers or people that voiced their strong opposition to his decision. But he just did what he felt led to do.  And well my mom… I have literally never met a person who is so hard to explain with words as Denise Megow. I talk about her (or do my impression of her… which she loves. hahaha) quite frequently with my friends. I love trying to explain her larger than life personality mixed with a quirky artistic flair and a gentleness that can be reserved at times, but it still very evident when it needs to be. She could not care less about whatever you think about her. She is not influenced by your opinion or thoughts on her decision. I freaking love that about both of my parents. They embrace their weirdness.

Tom: "Hey Honey. What should we do for this year’s Christmas Card photo?”

Denise: “I have a good idea. Let’s all go in the goat yard and just kinda see what unfolds on film.”

Megow Holiday Picture Circa 1996

So moving on from parents to me and my crew, I absolutely love the idea of my kids not giving a rip about what other people think. True; there are social norms, common courtesy, and a moral code to uphold, but I’m talking about them just being themselves. If they choose to be interested, dress, act, more mainstream, I’m completely cool with that as well. Mostly, I just want them to be the truest version of themselves. I kinda view it like dancing in public. How many of us dance around the house or in the car listening to music? But when the same song comes on at a wedding reception or social event, we just stand there and stare at the one “weird person” cutting a rug on the dance floor. My goal is for my kids to always be that “weird person”. Just completely void of peer pressure to live life the way they want.

Seth. Keepin' it classy. 

Now, I’m not saying weird people are the best (but we secretly are right? *wink* ) I just wanted to express how much I love when people are truly themselves whatever that may look like. My kids love to wear their clothes on backwards and inside out. They think it’s so fashionable. Do I let them go everywhere like that?  No. But when we go to the park or go out to eat, I let my kids wear whatever the heck they want. When we go to the park, if they want to crawl around on all fours like baby cats and pretend to hawk up hairballs by the swings then I say, freaking go for it. Why not?

I don’t know if it’s my complete lack of influence to peer pressure or if it’s a single dad thing, but I’ve kinda just given on up making my clan fit into a mold of society. Of course, I train them that there are times to conform a little (don’t give your friends cat baths at school or you can’t wear inside-out bathing suit trucks with a tuxedo shirt to church, etc.) However for the most part, if my kids want to do, eat, wear, or act a certain way that’s not inappropriate or disrupting I’m pretty cool with it. I view my responsibility as a parent to be a role model for kindness, love, hard work, integrity, and encouragement. Like I said earlier I still teach them social norms, right & wrong, and appropriate behavior, but besides that I love my kids being themselves, in whatever way that might look.

Seth: "Ok guys. No school today, so you get to come to work with dad,

 and you can wear whatever you want."

Kids: 

Who knows if my kids will decide to go full weird? Maybe they will choose to be like their dad and decide to wear only polyester disco shirts their entire eighth grade year of school. Or maybe not. Mostly, I just want them to comfortable expressing however they choose to be. And one day when they do get called “weird” to be able to confidently look at the person, smile, and say “Thanks. You’ve made my day.” And they just continue on their way…

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth

God and Parenting

First things first. I love the diversity in this little “iPad in the dishwasher” readership community.  My goal was to create something that would appeal to an extremely broad spectrum of people. Whether it be: gender, age, socioeconomic status, parent or non-parent, single or married, etc., I love the variety of people that enjoy sharing the experience of life together with the Megows. Another thing that I feel I’m truly blessed with, is a pretty diverse audience when it comes to spiritual or non-spiritual beliefs. I don’t take this as a platform to be preachy nor sway anyone’s opinion by whatever I write. To be fair about 87% of all of this is probably fart jokes and embarrassing dad stories, so I’m not sure how that would relate in that area anyways. While I have my own beliefs and think it’s important for others to have theirs, I’m neither pretty positive that most people simply dislike debating, nor do they enjoy have people try to convince me of anything with “facts”. Most of these conversations end up with people becoming more entrenched in their own ideas and sometimes leave a bitter taste in our mind of the other person or their point of view.  So all of that being said, I want to discuss God and Parenting. Hopefully, that won’t turn anyone off to reading this post, but if it does, I promise the next post will be back to the normal nonsense. :)

I rarely talk about my faith in depth on the blog. Not that it’s not important; to me it’s the most important aspect of my life. Like I said earlier, that’s just not my style. To be honest, I'm not one to initially engage people much on the topic of my spiritual beliefs. Again, that’s just the way I’m wired. I prefer to just live the closest I can to Jesus. My goal is to life in such a way that there’s something refreshing and peaceful amidst this background of the chaos of the world. I truly believe that draws people. (Not that there’s anything wrong with anyone just bluntly bringing up their spiritual beliefs with anyone. In fact, I think that’s great. It’s just not the way I do it. We are all wired differently. Isn't that so neat!!) I love the idea that my life is so radically changed from once was. I love that God made me an encourager. I love the God gave me the gift of joy. I just love the way God wired and continues to wire me. I just love God. I want that love to be curious to anyone who wants to know more. I’ve talked to quite a few people about what I believe once they have asked me about my life. I love to share because it’s shockingly simple. I think that’s also how I incorporate loving God into being a parent.

I think my biggest fear is that my children might see me as a hypocrite. I know that’s pretty blunt, but it’s the truth. I couldn’t imagine a worse scenario for my children’s and my relationship. “Well, dad says this, but dad does this. Dad says God wants us to live this way, but dad doesn’t live like that.” That’s utterly terrifying to me as a parent. They soak up EVERYTHING. My kids can still recall the time I yelled at them 3 years ago for letting the bath water fill the bathroom.  The good and the bad, they just soak it up. So first of all, I make sure that whatever I teach them, I’m actually doing in my own life or else it’s not only going to not be effective, but probably lead to some trust issues and confusion later down the road.

Also, children are so wonderfully inquisitive. My kids love to hear Bible stories or ask questions about heaven, right vs wrong, church, etc. At that young of an age, they just have the ability to sense peace & love and are drawn to that. I love to talk about God with them. I love to talk about why I love Jesus with them. They are quick to ask questions and are already forming their own individual opinions that are probably different than mine. I just think that’s great. I don’t want my kids to just have a copy & paste theology of whatever I believe. I want them to have their own unique God encounters. I can show them building blocks of believing and living like Jesus, but I want them to be passionate about finding out more. In my opinion, if I try to give my kids the full definition and describe the full personality of God that would be doing them a disservice. I think that’s one thing I really appreciate about the way my parents raised me. They gave us basic building blocks, but pretty much encouraged us to get to know Him personally.

Next point. Children have so much faith and willingness to believe their parents. I teach my kids about God, and they want to learn. However, while I believe the faith of a child is probably the most beautiful thing ever, there is such a complexity and just awe about God at the same time. At times it can be just a lot to take in for a little kid. In Sunday school they memorize verses, at dinner we read devotionals; at VBS they do Christian crafts. All of these things teach them about God. Please don’t misunderstand me. I love all of those things. I just don’t want my kids to be drowned in a sea of cute crafts and bible verse memorization games, that they miss real world application. This is my job as a parent. I’m nowhere close to perfect. My kids see my screw up daily. However, I want them to also see me forgive daily. I want them to see me go out of my way to help someone just because. I want them to see dad return cruelty with kindness. I can’t think of a better way to instill a solid foundation of kindness and love. Pretty much, I want them to see me love people because I love God. Then, I want to bring them in, and let them see how incredible it feels to serve others. That’s basically my entire goal. And yes. Wow. That’s such a responsibility. How many people do you know get turned off from their parents’ beliefs because of the behavior of their parents? So yes, I teach my kids. But I want them experience to actually experience serving God and serving others. I want to show them the best way I know how to live a self-less life.

The funny thing is that I believe that my kids are so much cooler than me. I am already seeing them love people so much more intentionally and personally than I could ever imagine. They make it a point to either hug or compliment someone literally everywhere we go. I guarantee they will pinpoint at least one person and shower them with love. Tonight we went to the grocery store and while we were checking out, Stevie peeked over the counter and said to the cashier “I love your name. It’s so pretty, just like your face. Can I give you a hug?” Duh. My heart melted. Speaking of heart melting, this is probably my favorite Megow activity. I’ve never shared it before, but I think now’s a fun time to share. About a year or two ago, we randomly bought a cashier a candy bar when we were checking out. It just made her day. Her face literally lit up with joy. Now almost EVERY time we check out, I let the kids take turns asking the cashier what his/her favorite candy bar is, finding that candy bar amongst the selection near the register, sneaking it into the back of our groceries, and finally after we pay they exclaim with a huge smile “That candy is for you!” I’ve seen cashiers cry before from these little sweet kids picking them out candy and buying it for them. I mean, of course, I’m the one paying. But I’ve just seen this amazing development in their hearts and mind at the checkout. They have shifted from asking for candy for themselves to guessing the cashier’s favorite candy. That’s something I never would have done as a child. They are just so amazing, and I love it so much.

Now I say all of this to say I am far from the perfect example of Godly parenting. I’m still selfish, grumpy, and yell enough to convince myself of that. My kids and I are still learning all of this each day. I wanted to write this post, mostly just to talk about how neat and fulfilling it is to be able to experience all of this as a family. To see my kids grow and flourish in ways I couldn’t even plan or comprehend yesterday. It’s just a gift that we get to experience with each new day. :D

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing,

Seth